Is Authenticity Holding You Back?

In the workplace, we hear and speak of showing up authentically quite often. Miriam-Webster describes someone who is authentic as “true to one’s own personality, spirit, character.”

It’s important to show up authentically, not only so others can see you as you are, but so you can be comfortable in your own skin. When you can feel comfortable being yourself, you show up more confidently. Your presence in the room or even in zoom meetings changes in a positive way.

What does showing up authentically mean to you? For me, when I am behaving in a way that is aligned with my values, I feel like I show up authentically. That isn’t all of it, I also feel like I show up authentically when I am willing to take a risk that has the possibility of perhaps me showing up awkwardly or vulnerably and being okay with that. I can honestly tell you that people around you are excellent at determining who is and isn’t being authentic. They may initially give you the benefit of the doubt, but if you are behaving in a way that doesn’t match the words that are coming out of your mouth, they discover quite quickly whether they can trust you. Trust is the bedrock of relationships, and when it gets eroded, it is hard to win that back.

So, when does being authentic hold you back? Recently a client told me her boss wanted her to be more assertive. The boss felt like it would give her more exposure in her career when she was able to present her point of view more confidently. This would also help her get the recognition and the opportunity she desired. She felt that in doing so she wasn’t going to be her authentic self. We talked about whether that was really true. Which of her values was the boss pushing up against that she felt she couldn’t be herself? In our continued conversation, she realized that she wasn’t compromising any of her values. She was being asked to develop a skill that would benefit her in her current job, and her career, even though it made her feel a little uncomfortable.

Authenticity can’t be used as an excuse to be unprofessional, rude, or disrespectful. Being any of those things are inappropriate and may definitely hold you back. However, it has nothing to do with being authentic.

What may hold you back in your career is when you mistake a learning opportunity for compromising who you are because you are a little fearful. In evaluating each situation where authenticity comes up for you, ask yourself, “If I do this, will I be compromising any of my values? Is this about authenticity or is it about fear of not doing it well enough?”

We have all felt like an impostor at times, feeling like we don’t know enough, aren’t smart enough, don’t have enough experience. However, it is through our experience of trying and having a plan to keep practicing that the feeling of imposter recedes. So always be your authentic self and keep the door open for learning opportunities.

Communication Podcast by Donna Aldrich

"I like to say you can communicate just about anything, but it is often how you communicate that really matters. Take a listen to my podcast which talks about the opportunities leaders have in communicating impactfully to their teams."

Donna Aldrich is an author and certified professional coach with expertise in Executive and Leadership coaching. She works with both current and aspiring leaders to develop their skills so they can lead from where they are confident.

Her specialty is partnering with her clients and providing tools to create action oriented plans that drive their careers forward in a decisive manner while they maintain integrity, professionalism and their authenticity.

First-Time Managers Start Here: Building a Solid Foundation for New and Aspiring Managers is available on Amazon.

Close Up Radio Spotlights Donna Aldrich of Aldrich Coaching

North Andover, MA – Donna Aldrich is the founder of Aldrich Coaching where she provides leadership coaching at all levels of an organization to help people to become better leaders and advance their careers.

“Coaching is about facilitating the conversation to bring in new perspectives and widen the lens so leaders can be effective. Taking the time in a coaching session to reflect through powerful questions can be very helpful.”

“Leaders have to figure out how to get results through their team in order to really elevate themselves,” says Donna.

According to Donna, results are important––they are your ticket through the door––but how you collaborate, communicate, innovate and develop yourself and others is also critical.

Donna is the author of First-Time Managers Start Here: Building a Solid Foundation for New and Aspiring Managers.

“There's relatively no training for first-time managers, nothing that gives first time managers the fundamentals,” says Donna. “First-Time Managers Start Here is where new and aspiring managers begin. It's a really practical guide that answers all the questions first time managers have and provides them the blueprint they need to be successful in their first management position and beyond.”

For more information, visit www.aldrichcoaching.com

First-Time Managers Start Here: Building a Solid Foundation for New and Aspiring Managers is available through Amazon and Barnes & Noble

If I’m in the Right Company, Am I in the Right Job?

Last week I talked about whether you were working in the right company and began to unlock that answer by asking:

Do my values align with the values of the company?

Does the leadership of the company inspire and motivate me?

Is there room to grow and develop and is it encouraged?

 This week we begin the discussion with the assumption that you are in the right company so are you in the right job? Factors such as clear goals and expectations, growth and development supported by your manager, being empowered, recognition and team dynamics all play a part in determining if you are in the right role.

One of the important components to understanding if you are in the right job is understanding if the expectations of your job are clear. Nothing causes more confusion or leads to more disappointment if you and your manager are not aligned here.  You and your manager should agree on what your goals are, and what you will achieve by when. Goals must also be achievable. It doesn’t mean there can’t be stretch goals. It is good to try to move beyond what you think you are capable of.  However, there should be a balance between achievable and stretch goals and you should understand exactly what is expected of you.  If goals change due to unforeseen circumstances in the organization, the expectations for your performance should change as well. Understanding expectations through dialogue with your manager will help prevent you from being overloaded with work.  Priorities may shift and they often do, but work can’t be a continual pile on. Trying to do it all without relief is not a recipe for success or job satisfaction.

First-Time Managers Start Here: Building a Solid Foundation for New and Aspiring Managers

By Aldrich, Donna

Are you empowered to get your job done without being micromanaged? It is important to feel trusted by those around you including your manager.  Taking the initiative and making decisions should be encouraged. I often hear managers say, “This is how I have done this in the past.” when handing over responsibilities to their direct reports.  This sets up the employee to think that is the way the manager wants to see it done.  This doesn’t leave much space for the employee to be creative or come up with their own way of working.  A better method may be to ask the employee how they might handle a project or situation first.  I see this happening in meetings as well.  The manager asks for employee feedback but says “Here’s what I think,” prior to anyone else speaking.  As a manager it is a good idea to collect the feedback, repeat back what you have heard and then maybe share your opinion.

Are you being recognized for the results you are achieving? Recognition comes in many forms and everyone is motivated differently. It can be monetary recognition or public recognition. It may be recognition in the way of promotion, or in taking on new responsibilities.  You need to decide what is important to you, and ensure your manager knows what kind of recognition you are looking for.

Is your manager engaged in your growth and development? Depending on where you want to go with your career, it is important for your manager to support your journey.  Not having room to grow is one of the biggest reasons people leave their jobs.  Not only does the organization’s culture need to support the growth and development of its employees, the manager needs to do so as well.  You and your manager should set aside time to discuss what you would like to achieve, or where you would like to grow, at least a few times a year.  The manager can help pave the way by making introductions, showcasing your work to others, and exposing you to new experiences.  This is a two-way street, however, and you need to do your part in taking initiative and meeting commitments when these opportunities are presented to you.

Understanding your strengths is also an important component of answering this question. Do you know what your strengths are?  If yes, then are these the skills you are using to get your job done? Playing to your strengths is important in job satisfaction.  Studies have shown that you grow faster when you play to your strengths.  This doesn’t mean that you don’t develop your gap areas, especially if they are required in the job that you do.  We don’t all have the luxury of delegating to others who are stronger in those areas.  You must understand what is required of you in those gap areas in order to be successful and perform to that level. To close the gap, you may need assistance from your manager or your peers.   You may also need to take some additional training.

Do you enjoy working with your colleagues? The team or department dynamics play an important role in establishing relationships at work.  Do you trust your teammates? I believe collaboration and support of colleagues are important in our day to day job satisfaction.  Can you reach out to a colleague when you need help? Are you willing to offer support when someone else needs it? Again, the manager plays a very important role in modeling and fostering collaboration and respect within the team.

There may be other reasons for you to stay in your current job.  It is personal to you. However, if answering the questions above produces many negative responses, then perhaps it is time to think about a change.